fishing humour

19
May
2019

Five New Fishing Quotes and Sayings

Five new fishing quotes bring the total up to 1325.

“Strange: when working I think about fishing, when fishing I don’t think about working.” # 1321

“The fishing was so bad even liars didn’t catch anything.” #1322

“I may seem quiet and reserved to you, but if you mess with me while I’m fishing, I will break out a level of crazy that will make your nightmares seem like a happy place.” # 1323

“What do the little fishes do that make the most truthful men untrue?” #1324

“You know when they have a fishing show on TV? They catch the fish and then let it go. They don’t want to eat the fish; they just want to make it late for something.” # 1325

See them all here.

Posted by Tony Bishop in fishing humour, fishing quotes, weird fishy stuff
12
Nov
2016

Five New Fishy Quotes and Sayings

More musings on fishing and fishermen.

“The first principle in all fishing is simple: never let the fish know he’s being fished for.”  #1271

“The whole notion of trout fishing would not be so romantic if the trout did not win, too.”  #1272

“I’ve never had all the flies I wanted, probably never will, and couldn’t carry them all if I did.” #1273

“Most fly patterns should be works in progress.” – Lou Tabory #1274

“Confidence is the best lure in your tackle box.” #1275

– see all the quotes here

Posted by Tony Bishop in fishing quotes
05
Sep
2014

Five More Fishing Quotations and Sayings – 5 September 2014

They just keep coming – 5 more fishing quotations and sayings bring the total to 1215.

“Fly tying – The art of attaching feathers, fur, wool, and silk to a tiny hook to create artificial lures that imitate insects, a skill easily mastered by anyone who can peel a grape blindfolded with a pair of tweezers and a butter knife while wearing oven mitts.” – Number 1211

“Early on I decided that fishing would be my way of looking at the world. First it taught me to look at rivers.  Lately it has been teaching me how to look at people, myself included.” Thomas McGuane  – Number 1212

“In my opinion, fishing then becomes a mirror which reflects all of our being and our values in life – and in return our values determine how we fish. One goes into the other and the boundaries merge… Doing becomes being and being becomes doing; a magic circle with no beginning or end and our hearts always standing where they belong – directly in the centre.” Lani Waller –  Number 1213

“There is nothing so gone as a lost fish!” – Number 1214

“To say it was all just a matter of catching fish would be like saying that astronomy is nothing more than noticing the stars.” Harry Middleton – number 1215

See all 1215 here.

Posted by Tony Bishop in fishing quotes
24
Jul
2013

Five New Fishing Quotations and Sayings: Jul 24 2013

Here we go with some wit and wisdom wrapped around fishing – quote numbers 1151 – 1155.

“I can think of nothing material that has been substantively improved for the angler in the past fifty years, except his waders”
– Gordon Wickstrom, Late in an Angler’s Life

“The choice between the rainbow – often easier to hook and harder to land, and the brown – always harder to hook and sometimes easier to land, is a matter of taste and style, and there are no rights and wrongs in the matter.”
– Te Ara Encyclopedia of New Zealand

“One man’s fish is another man’s poisson” 
– Hoo Izit

“Thank you, dear God, for this good life and forgive us if we do not love it enough. Thank you for the rain. And for the chance to wake up in three hours and go fishing: I thank you for that now, because I won’t feel so thankful then.”
– Garrison Keillor

“When I die, I want one of life’s great mysteries revealed to me: if some slob can carry a full 12 ounce can of beer half a mile to stream, why the hell can’t he carry it out when it is empty?”
– R. Chad Chorney, Blood Knot Magazine

Now 1155 fishing quotations here.

Posted by Tony Bishop in fishing humour, fishing quotes
14
Oct
2009

Muddy Waters – Of Mud, Mothers, Eels and the Boy

Reading the story in my last post about a big eel attacking a trout here in New Zealand reminded me that the first story I ever wrote for New Zealand Fishing News magazine was about eels.

It was written about 22 years ago – don’t time fly! It was pretty well received way back then, so maybe it is time for a re-run. Have a read here

Posted by Tony Bishop in fishing humour, New Zealand Fishing
14
Oct
2008

Assorted Fishy Weirdness

Is there something in the water? Is there an outbreak of strangeness? Your guess is as good as mine.

Crotch lobster

Oh my. While some folks are hard at work designing new marine protected areas for southern California, others are shoving lobsters down their pants. Stealing lobsters isn’t particularly difficult — wardens say it’s one of the most common poaching …

Mysterious fish said to eat people in India

It’s called a goonch, and it’s a catfish that can get really big and is said to be eating people in India and Nepal. The story is strange. The goonch probably started down the path of eating people by scavenging bodies disposed in rivers in the area,…

Holy Lures!

One of the most amazing fishing tackle stories of all-time centers on a group of Franciscan nuns in Ohio who decided to go into the tackle business. Calling their lures “St. Peter’s Fishing Lures,” they manufactured and sold a line of 16 different …

Trouser Trout Marketing

The Levi’s “unleash your beast” campaign encourages web users to create and share with friends animated images of phallic creatures popping out of 501 jeans. The American Decency Association is calling for a boycott.

Posted by Tony Bishop in fishing humour, weird fishy stuff
09
Apr
2008

Flyfishmagazine: Dont be that guy….

A story for all fishermen, salt and fresh water……

Via MaineToday comes a story of fly fishing conversation etiquette. I think we all have met that guy…
“I caught a 22-inch rainbow yesterday,” he offered, with nothing else. I could see he was waiting for me to, pardon the pun, take the bait.
He waited a few seconds, maybe 10, and took a quick puff of his cigarette.
“Not here, you know.”
I just nodded, and he puffed again.

He then went into a long litany of where he’d been fishing, how many fish he’d caught and how long they all were. To hear him tell it, he’d filled an entire wall with trophy-sized mounts — all from the last six days!
He caught a brown out of China Lake. “You know that’s open, right?”
He caught splake by the bucketful near Bingham. “They’re all, like, 15-24 inches up there.”
And then there was the rainbow.
“Oh, they’re biting all right. You just got to know where to go.”

I guess the only fisherman I hate to be accosted by as much as the guy above is the old, “Ya should ‘av been  here yesterday” guy, who then proceeds to tell you in meticulous detail, why. Just what you need when the fishing today is hard.

Don’t Be That Guy

Posted by Tony Bishop in fishing humour
23
Aug
2007

World’s shortest fairy tale

I know it is so old it wears a bear-skin and carries a club, but there must be one other person on the planet who has not seen it

Posted by Tony Bishop in fishing humour